After a hiatus the action returns and we have all you need to know about this week's fun and games...
Marcus Rashford kicked off things, scoring an absolute blinder against Boz Johnson playing for Conservative dis-United. Johnson had hoped to sneak the ending of school meal vouchers over the holidays past players and commentators alike, until a superb tackle from Rashford forced an embarrassing U-turn. In the after match press conference, Johnson defended his decision saying he didn't know poor people could become famous. But fellow team mates expressed disappointment, pointing out that making kids go hungry during a pandemic was always going to be an own goal.
The Premier League made several symbolic gestures in support of those protesting racial injustice in the UK and North America. But not everyone agreed with the decision to put 'Black Lives Matter' on the back of players' shirts. "Of course black lives matter," insisted Priti Patel as she signed the deportation order for a gay Nigerian man who's asylum claim was rejected, "I just don't see why people need to go on about it". Players have also been allowed to take a knee during the opening of matches. Dominic Raab told a radio interviewer that he thought the whole thing was from Game of Thrones, presumably believing that Colin Kapaernick sacrificed his NFL career to protest the unjust treatment of Ned Stark.
Off the field, there has been controversy in the board room. The Department for International Development (DFID) saw a change in management during a hostile take-over by the Foreign and Commonwealth Office (FCO). Despite being an effective team, frequently coming top of league tables on government transparency and effectiveness, it is to be merged with the FCO. Former Conservative dis-United manager, David Cameron criticised the move and ex-DFID coach Andrew Mitchell described it as a 'quite extraordinary mistake'. But the government has remained resolute, arguing DFID has "been treated as a giant cash point in the sky". In unrelated news, the Prime Minister spent £900,000 painting the UK team colours onto Number-10's jet, presumably a good use of tax-payer's money drawn from the Cabinet Office's own cash point in the sky.
They hoped it wasn't over, it is now.
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